First, to get the new stuff out of the way...
(backstory)...
A few weeks ago I was riding the bus up to work, and was talking with this boy from Montana. I told him to come up to the bar for a drink, like I tell everyone. I didn't really expect him to show up. Well, he did. He was also wandering the streets. And for the life of me, I don't know why I did, but I told him if by the end of my shift he didn't have anywhere to go, he could stay at my house. I knew how dangerous it was, but I felt, inclined, and honor bound by the stupid Montana connection, to offer him a place to stay. Well, come midnight there he was.
On the way there I gauged him out, and he felt fine to me. We talked of, among other things, spirituality. While I'm poly, In my sexual exploits as well as my religious ones, he was very monagamous. His one true god and Jesus were in his heart, and guiding his path, he claimed. After I fed and let him shower the next day he was off; but many a conversation we had on life and paths. This is my result. I call it "Conversation with a Xian"
You kept asking the age old question of life, beauty, and hatred
with the look of fanaticism only Jesus can bring
You point to the Bounty of my Mother, Goddess Demeter
and dare you say your false god above, that male
who knows nothing of true creation
dare you say “He made the lavender”, the enveloping scent you rub on your neglected skin to pour out with your sweat.
Dare you say, he provides, he made you see…
And I try to tell you that we are what we make of ourselves
don’t take our minds for granted!
There is such beauty in simplicity but you are to busy
trying to see what makes me love as I do
and what makes you want me
What makes what we perceive as boundaries stop us from trying to lift our wings and fly.
… too busy to notice that it is all inside, you can’t search it out
in those wide open skies… if you don’t recognize
the Divinity in you, first.
Life is meant to be enjoyed now, not when our bodies die.
Then you talk about Will like you’ve known the guy for ages
But what I know as Will is a completely different thing.
You say it’s a gift, I know it’s innate.
When I told you to see Truth in your own way
You replied, with gleaming enthusiasm enough to win your inner child the ice cream it wanted, “I have!”
But I can see, I can read that child-like gleam
You are lying to me and to yourself; and I’ve just scared
that soft warm feeling out of your open heart
and down through your calloused feet.
I wish I could show you my Truth, but you won’t accept it
It would frighten you to let go, to truly let go… to see…
For I’ve walked the path you’ve walked at least five times
before I finally learned to trust myself and love as we were meant to.
What is this “Sin” of which you speak?
Have you no pleasure, no “vice”?
If all you see is damnation then damned you will be.
And yet, here you proclaim that all is good if we just believed
Without blind trust and love all is damned?
Quit lying to yourself “it’s all the same in the end”
The journey of life has more in it’s purpose than the end.
I wrote another great poem this week, but I'm still not ready to call it finished (inasmuch as poetry can be finished,)and I'm not sure I want it public, either. It's quite close to me.
Speaking of... family...
What a tangle. Best wishes, and happiness and peace....
I think that's all I really have to say tonight. If not, I'll let you know one way or another...
"
During the last rays of the sacred moon
I walk the desolate terrain cold and all alone
The rider came to me a black tornado, a violent mass
The cloud of evil rose, now I'm marked for all time
Temptation befell me
Darkness is calling for me
This is the path that I choose
This is the path that I choose
Forced power besieged in me
Showing visions of what will be
Now obsessed with my fate
I must go forth and conquer
The chosen one to lead the pack
This boiling hate has risen
From the depths of my blackened heart
This madness is my destiny
Temptation befell me
Darkness is calling for me
This is the path that I choose
This is the path that I choose"
"The Path That I Choose", Iced Earth, "Night of the Stormrider"
Breathe, and remember the paths you've walked before.
Twilight and Beauty,
Saraid